01.2: BEHIND-THE-WALL CONTENT: Decoding Festive Signals

What You Body Language is Saying During the Holidays

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Pictured above: Selfie of Janine Driver (Dec. 2023)

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Your support means a lot, and I'm thrilled to have you on board for this FUN and exciting journey. As a token of appreciation, as a subscriber, you will enjoy exclusive content, strategies, videos, and techniques designed to enrich your experience and empower you further "In the DRIVER'S Seat" of your life.

For this week's exclusive content, you and your fellow subscribers’ will receive two additional holiday quick tips inspired from my family’s holiday party. Then you’ll delve into unique exercises tailored to each of the four intriguing body language moves discussed in our recent newsletter, plus two from this Exclusive newsletter’s tips. These practical exercises, if you choose to try them out, will enhance your understanding and mastery of these powerful non-verbal cues (so do them for the love of God).

Let’s drive in…

BONUS QUICK TIP #1: Candy Cane Conversations: Head Tilts and Genuine Holiday Connections

At my early family Christmas party, one teenager's subtle head tilt while talking to another teenager sparked speculation about a potential crush. Out of respect, I'll keep the details discreet.

However, know this, it resembled the intrigue that unfolded during Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's promotional tour for their movie "Mr. & Mrs. Smith."

At a press junket, Angelina Jolie tilted her head, looked Brad Pitt up and down, and coyly averted her gaze—a subtle yet telling gesture that something was stirring. A similar atmosphere of curiosity unfolded at our holiday party.

Video above: Janine Driver weighs in on Angelina Jolie‘s body language flirting technique with Brad Pitt during the promotion tour of the movie, Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Copyright History Channel (2010)

Angelina and the guest at my family party aren’t alone with their attentive head tilts, there’s also Frankie!

See, as a keynote speaker and decision-making consultant, my yearly travel ranges between 50 to 100 trips. Being a single mom to three sons and an enthusiast of cultural exchange, I have a live-in Aupair from another country to assist me.

While some Aupairs’ have been forgettable, three have become my host daughters for life, part of my forever family. One of these cherished host daughters is Francesca, affectionately known as Frankie. She authentically cares for and engages with my kids, like yesterday when I caught a candid video of her, head tilted, attentively listening to my oldest son, Angus, as he shared a story.

Video above: Janine Driver’s host daughter from Italy, Francesca Guarisco, tilts her head to her right while listening to Janine’s oldest son, Angus, talk about the play he’s auditioning in for school (Dec. 2023). Special guest appearance by our 2-year old yellow lab, JoJo! Video taken by Janine Driver

Who would think something so simple would make someone feel important?!

Yup, amidst the flow of holiday conversations, this subtle yet significant gesture often overlooked—tilting the head while listening. Scientific studies shed light on the importance of this nonverbal cue, demonstrating how a simple head tilt can serve as a powerful indicator of genuine interest during festive interactions.

First up, in the realm of social psychology, there’s Dijksterhuis and Bargh (2001), who investigated the automatic effects of social perception on behavior in their study, "The Perception-Behavior Expressway." The research suggests that nonverbal cues, such as head tilts, influence social behavior.

Then there was Burgoon, Stern, and Dillman (1995) who dove into the dynamics of interpersonal adaptation in their study, "Interpersonal Adaptation: Dyadic Interaction Patterns." The findings underscore the pivotal role of nonverbal cues, including head movements, in communication. A slight tilt of the head communicates engagement and a keen desire to comprehend, fostering deeper connections in holiday conversations.

So, as you navigate through the festive chatter, remember that the subtle tilt of your head isn't just a casual movement—it's a powerful expression of genuine interest. It's the candy cane of communication—simple yet delightful!

BONUS QUICK TIP #2. Festive Facial Expressions: Wouldn’t you agree that the holidays are a facial expression extravaganza?!

As you might imagine, laughter and silliness took over the party as we unraveled those festive cracker favors. With a pull on each side, they burst open, revealing a delightful combination—a joke to share with the person beside us, a paper crown adorning heads (or, in my 17-year-old nephew Tommy's case, perched over his baseball hat all night), and amusing mustaches that, naturally, all the "cool kids" (including yours truly) promptly adorned. Whether the mustaches found their place above our lips or raised eyebrows, the joy in our house skyrocketed.

Pic above: Janine Driver selfie with mustache eyebrows; Janine‘s youngest son, Jack and Janine‘s youngest sister; Caileen. Family friend, Lily, and Janine’s niece, Abigail Horrigan; Janine‘s nephews, Tommy, and Jake Strollo (2023). Pics taken by Caileen Horrigan

Genuine smiles and raised eyebrows during holiday gatherings contribute to a positive atmosphere. And scientific insights highlight the role of authentic smiles and eyebrow flashes in contributing to a positive and joyous atmosphere during holiday celebrations.

For instance, in Ekman, Davidson, and Friesen's study (1990) on the Duchenne smile, featured in the "Journal of Personality and Social Psychology," they delve into the authenticity of smiles.